Life... its good, but in a sweet sorrowful way..

I am a very complicated simple person.
How do you like that for a descriptor.

I still often sit is a tear filled stupor some days.. in full disbelief that I need to reset my navigation.
That all of my little girl dreams have been shattered and that I need to start over.

Its not a fun thought.
Many things are going on in my life right now.

Some of it is very painful.

But I do have one saving grace.. and that is K.

He is pretty special.

I thought for sure he would be sick to death of me talking about Mark, but he is not.
Often he cries right along side of me when I tell him of some of the things we went through together.

And then he has this teasing side where he tells me his eyes are tired from looking at pretty girls all day long, but when he sees me, he realizes there is only one beautiful girl in this world.. (geez..)

He often make the statement that he cant believe that we were able to find each so soon after each others life changing events.

I tell him I know exactly how this all came to be...
and that my friends is through Fate.

I am very convinced that my sweet Mark had something with us meeting.
That Mark could not bear to see me so sad, so lonely, so alone.

K share many qualities that Mark did.
It still freaks me out that he brings me coffee every morning and pulls my car out of the driveway for me to get off to work.
Mark did this every single morning (I never asked him to do it, he just did it).. Maybe all husbands do these, but it just seemed remarkable that K does this without me so much as hinting.

K loves many of the same exact things that Mark did.
And he loves me... that is hard to share with you.. but it is true.. He looks out for me and cares for me than I can expond upon here.

So my life is good right now, but I am sharing an incredible sadness reliving the events that happened last year at this time..

I pray that God takes care of me (and my daughters) and brings peace to each of our hearts.

Be well my friends.. its almost 2 am.. and I think my urge to rest is finally kicking in..

kind regards
Barbara